Sexist Language: Uxorious

16 10 2008

Is the English language sexist? One example that’s always cracked me up is the word uxorious, defined as: having or showing an excessive or submissive fondness for one’s wife.

The concept makes sense, the idea that a man can be overly devoted to his wife, potentially as a detriment to himself. Anybody who lacks balance and dedicates himself too much to a single idea or object will eventually run into problems. However, search your dictionary for a comparable word that indicates the same level of extreme dedication a woman might have for a man, and you won’t find it.

The English language reflects a double standard here, because a man CAN be too devoted to his wife, but it is perfectly acceptable for a woman to be overly submissive to her husband. Isn’t that a little unfair? We can all agree that no person, regardless of gender, should surrender themselves completely to another person, to the point of harm.

A healthy relationship finds balance, reciprocated sacrifice, and a willingness to commit to one another. From this parity a healthy relationship can grow into a happy marriage.

So with the word uxorious, is the English language being sexist, or insensitive? There is no such word that applies to a woman being excessively fond or submissive of her husband.

I hope someone can prove me wrong and find the precise word we are trying to define here (a woman who is too submissively fond of her husband).

Perhaps I’ll have to invent the word myself..